a grace in forgiveness (джен)

There are things Lan Wangji counts on the days that pass painfully slowly. His breaths, the incense sticks burned down to ashes, the scars on his back. His memories of Wei Ying—the good ones. He counts those the most, searching into the darkest corners of his mind for more, a spare glance or laughs echoing toward the clouds. He counts the visits of his brother, twice a week. Sometimes he brings A-Yuan, bursting with stories of his friends and his lessons, and those are Lan Wangji’s favorites to count.
There are days like this, though, where it is just Lan Xichen. That is good, too.
 
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The Lan brothers discuss grief.