Can you hear me now? (or, Harry Potter versus Dumbledore)

Harry doesn't save Ginny in the chamber. Instead he tries to befriend the spirit of the Dark lord. As a result, he stumbles upon a secret that changes everything he thought was true. Includes witty vampires, car chases, moral dilemmas, a gunfight, torture, traitors and dramatic Malfoys. Blacks are also dramatic. Horror Parody.