Deep Misunderstanding (смешанная)

“Am I a bad friend?”
Hayden has always been the guy Shane joked with, the guy he trusted to feed him without mocking him, the guy he roomed with on the road, and Shane is the only man who has ever seen Hayden cry, and Hayden loves Shane. He fucking loves him. They are like brothers, and they have been for almost ten fucking years. He’s always been Shane’s guy, Shane’s best friend.
Except all along, maybe that wasn’t true. Ilya Rozanov, apparently, had been the guy. Before Hayden had ever met Shane, Ilya Rozanov had been there. And Hayden had never even noticed.
Shane is all over every inch of Hayden’s life. Hayden thought that was reciprocal.
+++
“You know I think about you all the time,
And my deep misunderstanding of your life,
And how bad it must have been for you back then,
And how hard it was to keep it all inside.”