Danger Noodle!

“Harry,” Severus sighed, coming to stand next to him. “What did I say about having the snake at the breakfast table?”

“Her name isn’t “the snake,” Harry murmured resentfully. Severus had gotten Noodle at the request of Dumbledore, but he obviously wasn’t the biggest fan of Harry’s new friend.

“Danger Noodle,” Severus said through gritted teeth, “needs to be put away while your classmates are trying to eat.”

“I’m sorry,” Harry sighed. “I just wanted everyone to meet her. It’s her first day and she’s really shy!”

“I highly doubt she can feel such a complex emotion as shyness, given that she is a reptile-” Harry moved his hands to cover Noodle’s nonexistent ears, glaring at his father’s lack of sensitivity, “- but even so, I’m sure she’ll be quite alright if you put her in your pocket while you eat your breakfast.”

“But- that feels so mean. And she’s hungry. You're going to your office now, aren’t you? Couldn’t you take her with you? She needs her rats.”

Severus stared at Harry, likely trying to surmise if he was being serious. Despite being a Slytherin, it had become quite clear in the past few days that Severus was not at all fond of snakes.